Courage to Love

Hey everybody.. been ages since I wrote anything actually worth reading.. HAHAHA.. Well.. been pretty busy with school stuff and slacking so guess I'll give it a shot before school officially starts. So here's a fictional piece of work.

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The bus seemed to take eternity to arrive, the music seemed to take forever to end. Yet none of these mattered for he was sealed in his own timeless state of thinking. The edges of his eyes reddened and as he made a stronger-than-usual blink, tears threatened to embarrass him in public.

As he forcefully made his eyes swallow the tears back, he muttered to himself "It doesn't matter, you'll get used to it, nothing really does matter". Yet, even if he were to get used to heartache, it didn't mean it wouldn't hurt. Every heartache hurt just as bad in all its entirety. All he could do was to get use to the process of hurting and carrying on.

He once thought of stripping himself of the courage to love. For without love there would be no pain. Or at least that was what he thought. It was the easy way out, the best defence he could construct, yet it wasn't an idea he could accept. He knew he had to love, to give and to care for reasons he himself couldn't come up with. He just couldn't stop loving...

So if he couldn't adopt this easiest way out, he could only go for the second-best alternative. Slowly and painfully, he stripped himself of the courage to be loved. If he could remove the hope of being loved, maybe he could alleviate his pain and stop his suffering from expanding.

This was no easy path. To give and not ask to receive. Yet maybe if he managed to slice off this tumour, he might be able to save his entire body. But remember, in emotions there is no anaesthesia.

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